"Do not seek to validate yourself through your child, if they do not wish to make eye contact do not force it.
If you do, you seek nothing but self service, for the validation that you exist is there in front of you.
Your child.
Validate them. Embrace and champion them. They are not there for your definition, they are there because you made them so."
read the whole post here: eye contact: for the recipient's validation only from thinking person's guide to autism